I went to my mother's house for the last time yesterday. Lloyd and I went to pick up the last few things that were coming to my house, Christmas decorations, the vacuum, etc.
It was not an easy time. As happy as I am that the house is sold (pretty much, we close on Friday) the idea that we will never again walk through those doors is much more upsetting than I'd imagined it would be.
I know it's silly, it's just a house but it was my home for over 25 years. I know what made it a home isn't there any longer and now someone else will make of it what my family did, but it's still depressing....
Monday, October 27, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Ok, it's been a long time since I wrote. There has been so much going on, a new job which I'm no longer at, new friends, old friends, family and just life.
The newest news is that the sale for my mother's house is expected to close without problems on Halloween. This is good news for so many reasons but I'm taking it very hard. I'm just freaking out. It needs to go, we've all been praying for someone to buy it before the winter but it's the house I grew up in and it is my HOME. It's the place where Santa and the Easter Bunny came, the tooth fairy too. It's the place where I went when I was sad, or sick or just lonely. It's where my FAMILY was and where they always came back to and it's going to be gone.
I am trying to tell myself it's just a house, that some other family will warm it and make it into a home for themselves and have the kind of memories my family made. It doesn't help though, it really doesn't.
Every aspect of my life has been changed since March. All the things I thought were solid, fell through. And everyone says it's going to get better but I just don't see how. I just want my mother back.
The newest news is that the sale for my mother's house is expected to close without problems on Halloween. This is good news for so many reasons but I'm taking it very hard. I'm just freaking out. It needs to go, we've all been praying for someone to buy it before the winter but it's the house I grew up in and it is my HOME. It's the place where Santa and the Easter Bunny came, the tooth fairy too. It's the place where I went when I was sad, or sick or just lonely. It's where my FAMILY was and where they always came back to and it's going to be gone.
I am trying to tell myself it's just a house, that some other family will warm it and make it into a home for themselves and have the kind of memories my family made. It doesn't help though, it really doesn't.
Every aspect of my life has been changed since March. All the things I thought were solid, fell through. And everyone says it's going to get better but I just don't see how. I just want my mother back.
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